1. Why did the politician go to art school?
Because he wanted to learn how to draw new district lines!
2. Why don’t politicians play hide and seek?
Because good luck finding one who’s hiding from the media!
3. How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two: one to change it and another to change it back once
they realize the old one was better for reelection.
4. Why was the politician a great gardener?
Because he was an expert at planting seeds of doubt!
5. Why did the politician bring a ladder to the debate?
Because he heard the polls were high!
6. Why don’t politicians ever play chess?
Because they already think they’re kings and queens!
7. Why did the politician bring a pencil to the speech?
Because he couldn’t erase his promises if he used a pen!
8. Why don’t politicians ever get lost?
Because wherever they go, there’s always
a map to the nearest fundraiser!
9. Why was the politician always calm during a crisis?
Because he had mastered the art of political “spin”!
10. Why was the politician always in good shape?
Because he was constantly running for office!