1. Why did the scarecrow become a successful politician?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
2. I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.
Then I realized she was talking about our relationship, not politics.
3. Why don’t politicians play hide and seek?
Because good luck finding anyone who actually wants to be found!
4. How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? Two: One to change it, and another to change it back again in case the first one doesn’t get re- elected.
5. Why did the politician go to the dentist?
Because he wanted to improve his campaign smile!
6. Why did the politician cross the road?
To kiss babies and shake hands, of course!
7. Did you hear about the politician who was afraid of stairs?
He was always taking steps to avoid them!
8. Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems,
just like a political campaign!
9. Why was the politician such a good gardener?
Because they knew how to plant promises and grow nothing!
10. Why don’t politicians tell secrets on the internet?
Because they’re afraid the NSA will leak them!