1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms in politics?
Because they make up everything!
2. What do you call a politician who’s really good at lying?
A professional.
3. Why did the scarecrow become a successful politician?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
4. Why don’t politicians ever play hide and seek?
Because good luck hiding from them after an election promise!
5. Why are politicians like diapers?
They both need to be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
6. How do you know a politician is lying?
Their lips are moving.
7. What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?
The letter F.
8. Why did the politician bring a ladder to the bar?
Because they heard the drinks were on the house.
9. How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They’ll just promise to do it during the next election.
10. Why did the politician cross the road?
To collect his kickback from the chicken!