1. What do you call a snobbish criminal going down stairs?
A condescending con descending.
2. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
To get to the other slide.
3. Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don’t work.
4. What do you get if you cross a snake and a pie?
A python.
5. Why did the giraffe get bad grades?
Because he had his head in the clouds.
6. Why did the sloth get a job at the DMV?
Because he was the slowest one there.
7. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?
Bacon and legs.
8. Why did the antelope start a band?
Because he had a lot of anteloping to do.
9. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear.
10. What do you call a fish that wears a bowtie?
Sofishticated.